Swole Auteur Theory
Swole Auteur Theory states that the best kind of movie director is a sexy movie director.
Who needs sublime art anyway? Good enough with a gimmick is what we want.
And continuity. We want to see your sexy charming ass every single day.
Or at least on a regular schedule. Be sexy, make things, and show up a lot.
This is Swole Auteur Theory.
The Swole Auteur recognizes that the primary work of art is yourself. The aesthetics of external creation begin with the aesthetics of one’s own appearance. Your art will always pale in comparison to your fine sexy ass.
The Swole Auteur doesn’t run around trying to desperately get rich and famous.
The Swole Auteur calmly goes to the gym every day knowing that, by getting swole, they will (in a roundabout way) attract the riches and fame they desire.
Because not everybody loves a visionary movie — but everybody loves a sexy bod.